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Clockwork

by Chris DeBoda

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1.
What do you say? Your feet on the table, your eyes on the ceiling. Just answer the question and I will be leaving. My God can someone please tell me why winter still is here? Oh my God, all I need is spring. Just answer the question and I will be leaving. I should have known. I should have left you alone.
2.
I can't describe your face; define you by a picture and I’m running out of ink. Bold reminders, reasons why I don't think that I’ll make it through this one breathing. I’m running out of space. They say it's cold outside the atmosphere, it’s cold in this apartment that I’m in. Just one more week of deadlines and I’ll be home for the holidays, I think. And I’ve been a cold lump of ideas and a mess to say the least, but I always make it back. I haven't slept a wink since Friday late last week. I don't remember anything. Remember every day down by the docks at the end of your street? All the things that you've given me reasons to hate. They say it's cold outside the atmosphere, it’s cold in this apartment that I’m in. Just one more week of deadlines and I’ll be home for the holidays, I think. Teaching shapes in early December; letter colored paint splashed across yellow paper. Fourteen squares of things to remember and good intentions penciled in bold, not written in pen.
3.
Car Accident 04:34
It’s a cop out, between the snow on the ground and its slow fall down. It’s calm in this city now while we wait for Christmas to come around. I drove all the way to Kensington, there back and forth today. Thought my luck was running thin, I was clearly onto something. Kept my thoughts inside my head but they've a way of coming clean. It’s a crazy place to grow up when you've never kept your face from being seen. Fall is bringing out the worst of everyone and everything. I keep repeating words as if they're somehow holding winter's key. If we get to this before we make the trip back home then please, don't forget about the plans that you made with me. You sure can pick them, can't you now? If you're listening then keep your camouflage on. Let me blindly pass you by, or let me be the one who keeps you warm at night. Fight it down into the ground. Keep your head above the cold blanket of sound. It’s our way of coming out with everything, it’s our way of keeping in with our personal things. You sure can pick them, can't you now? If you're listening then dress your camouflage down. Let me blindly pass you by, or let me be the one who's keeping you safe at night.
4.
Shades 03:29
I need consistency; I need to know you'll stay the same. It’s a fast paced place and I only believe most of the things that I can see. The colors always change; everything is always different to me. Wait for me, we're going home. Indifference is all we've known. The colors changed from winter shades. My friends and I are welcoming the spring, we’re bringing in this season singing. Is this a test; is this you getting your feet wet? Get in the water. If it's pass/fail, "sink or swim" then we can go out with this ship if it is sinking, or we can keep our heads up while we're swimming. My eyelids open then close. I won't sleep until we're home. The colors changed from winter shades. My friends and I are welcoming the spring, we’re bringing in this season singing. This captain will not go down with this ship; standing hip to hip in accordance from the strongest to the weakest link in order to find out who will survive this shipwreck.
5.
Down here it's raining all the time, that's why we never go outside. It’s not so bad when you're around, makes me forget to let that kind of thing bring me down. Down, not out. Never thought I’d figure this out, until I found you along the way. Now I’m thanking god for this old town. Yeah, I mostly kept to myself, I was down but not out. Yeah, I was down but not out.
6.
I’ve been up for days trying to break this gaze at the light from your smile. And my minds a maze, looking out for ways so I can just stay a while. So let your lips dress you up like Sunday’s best. It’s all that I can hope for. Four years later and I’m still waiting around. You’re always up for taking me down, and I’m always down for picking myself up. Are we losing touch, am I losing out? I’ll give you something subtle enough to break your concentration. Cause what we've found's a battleground and the bloodshed's something I can live without. All year long, we wait for the moments that keep us alive. And all year long, we knew something would come along and keep us younger. Just take a step back, a deep breath that won't leave your lungs struggling while you hold your breath. All year long, we took the steps we knew were in front of us. And now all we've got are reminders of what we never accomplished. So let my lips dress you down with promises. It's all that I can hope for. Four years still, by now you'd think I’d come around. You’re always up for taking me down, and I’m always down for picking myself up. I can be exactly what you want.

about

Clockwork is a collection of songs written about a particular year of my life.

credits

released February 19, 2016

All songs written & performed by Christopher DeBoda

Guest vocals by Emily Elborn on "Car Accident"
Guest vocals & additional writing by Rolando Winborn on "Money on the Counter"

Recorded, mixed & mastered in a variety of studios, apartments, and basements by Christopher DeBoda

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Chris DeBoda Maryland

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